Monday, November 7, 2016

How to construct the perfect Possum Blind

One of the most frequent questions we get here at Bubba's possum Ranch is "how do you make a possum blind?" This is a question I have not addressed hitherto for the simple reason every time I hear it I immediately think "are you kidding?" Usually followed by a seriously dismissive snort. If you have not heard one of those you should. You will definitely want to add that to your debate repertoire. It can be quite effective when used properly. But then I realized something. Not everyone has had the benefit of a good Southern upbringing. Especially one under the wise and practical tutelage of an accomplished possum angler such as the afore mentioned and much venerated Bubba. Y'all have missed out and I am sorry for that. I can't fix that short coming in your education completely, but I can bring you up to speed in this small but essential area.

This is by no means the only-est way to construct a possum blind. It is, however, the only-est way to construct the perfect possum blind. The key to the perfect possum blind, like baking a cake, is in the ingredients. Each element is essential and must be chosen with care. Placement is important but not critical. I will not cover common sensical considerations, such as ensuring you have a clear shot from the front porch, as if you can't figure that one out you really have no business owning a fine possum blind anyway. Oh yeah, do not place your possum blind between the front porch and your neighbor's trailer. Shooting into someone's domicile is generally considered a social faux pas.

The first element of a world class possum blind is the trailer. Some folks call this a mobile home but that is a real misnomer as we all know moving one twice is almost never worth the expense. It certainly isn't worth the effort. The right kind of trailer, once positioned, will settle in so to speak. It will conform itself to the topography until it achieves a state of harmonious perfection. Empty beer bottles, when dropped on the kitchen floor, naturally migrate over to the trash can on their own. The primary consideration when selecting your possum blind when it comes to a trailer is color. Green is king. Not too bright though. So faded green would be perfect. Rust works very well too.

Next comes the abandoned car. Experts will differ on this. The biggest divide runs along Chevy versus Ford lines. The choice here is really up to you but I highly recommend you stay with my afore mentioned color scheme. I like a good Ford Pinto. No doors is generally best but failing that no trunk lid and missing windows is certainly a very good choice.


There is no way I can over stress the importance of the choice of trash cans. Plastic just does not work. Many will disagree but theys wrong. They have to be galvanized and rusted to here and back. As to how many the rule of thumb is less is not more. More is more better. At least one needs to have the bottom rusted out completely. Lay that one on its side.

You are almost there, so stay with me. All you need now is the bait. There are any number of schools of thought here and you are certainly free to consult local experts. Any angler would be wise to consult the local experts, if you can find them and if you can get them to talk. That can be a real challenge. Once again I am here to impart and disseminate. Just about any trash will do but for the best results you need two main ingredients in large quantity. Empty beer cans and greasy chicken buckets filled with chicken bones. For the former I firmly believe nothing, and I mean nothing, beats Pabst blue ribbon. As a matter of fact, until I was old enough to go into a store by myself I didn't know there was any other kind. As for the latter, the choice of franchise and variety is clear. You want KFC original recipe. It has to be the bucket too. Quick snack boxes, two or three piece meals, and even the occasional Mrs. Winters will kind of work okay in an absolute pinch, but I refuse to recommend it. The bottom line, though, is extra crispy won't slick up the bottom of the bucket near as much as original recipe. Besides, possum hunting is all about tradition. There is a reason they call it original recipe. Colonel, if you a listening, God bless you for that. For best effect save the lid and put it back on before you place the bait. You want maximum over the bait time, so make 'em work for it.

There you go. As I said placement and location are really up to you. Most of you will not have the advantage of living in prime possum hunting locations, such as LA (Lower Alabama) or Fort Valley Georgia. Still, if you live in possum country, if you include these essential elements, you should do just fine. If nothing else you will have a grand time accumulating sufficient bait.

Good luck and good hunting!

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